Tuesday, January 20, 2009

I give up!

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I'm so tired of beating myself up.  Am I not the one that says to keep moving forward?  You can't change the past, so why dwell on it?


I'm tired of feeling like shit.  I'm tired of not being who I am, the part of me that I don't want to change.  I still have a list of things I want to do this year, and that list still includes flight school and horse back riding, but I don't know why I have to be so damn lame about it until I get there!


When I was pregnant I made a deal with myself that once I got back to my pre-pregnancy size I was going to start dressing how I want too all the time and not just let myself go because of the weather or having a child.  And as soon as it get crappy out - right out the door!  I just let myself go.  


I might not be able to wear heels in this stupid weather, but I can look nice every day.  I'm so over myself and this pity party I've been having.  I say screw it!  And in honor of my mantra - one of my life's little rules - yes, I'm taking my own advice.  

Cutting myself off.  Changing who I am.  Suffering in silence, hating myself and looking like crap while I do it... DONE!  DONE!!  AND LET ME TELL YOU - D-O-N-E!


New President!
New Era!
New me.

And now I'm done with this blog too!


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