Sunday, February 22, 2009

5 beers, one martini and 2 shots

So let me just give you a quick run down of the last 48 hours of my life...

Yesterday was the celebration of being single... meaning a couple of my friends are gettin' hitched in April and yesterday was their bachelor and bachelorette parties.

I was told the bachelor party was a good time.  Pizza, beer, wings and strippers.
Oh the way to a man's heart!

As for us lowly women we did the drink and dance thing.  Make the "bride-to-be" wear a veil, dance on bars, and on and on.  I hear that it was an interesting time... you see, by 11:30 I was tucked snugly in my bed.  Oh the brides sister and friend scooped me up and ran me home after I drank past my limit and well... let's just say the "demon" were expelled from my stomach and into a trash can... 

Seems I should just stick with coffee.
Oh, back in the day when I could kill 8 beers and who knows how many shots!  Yes.  Those days are officially over.  Mother of god... how they are SO OVER.

Thank the lord!  (promise not to recap at the wedding!)

I have to say, I actually wasn't embarrassed, which I normally am when I do something that... um... fun?  But I was fine and it worked out, for me that is.  Seems the story on the street is that one of the gals at the party hooked up with some fella and didn't turn up for 6+ hours, thus inducing a panic of sorts and ending in the brides sister "taking care" of the situation... 

Let's just say my bruises are nothing
Oh yeah!  My right arm has a hand mark on it!  Yup!  I'm thinking someone grabbed me as I fell into them... 
And my abs hurt


Moving on!  I finally watched Walk Hard - there were some funny one liners and the Beatles scene was hilarious (yes, I like something about the Beatles!  One damn drunk night I admitted that I don't think the Beatles are "Jesus Christ" of music and have never lived it down.  I would explain what I meant, but the point is mute.  The damage has been done and I'm sure, until I breath my last breath I'll hear about it.  "Hey!  You remember that night when we drank till 6am and you told us that you didn't like the Beatles... you broke our hearts that day..."  Sure I did.  If it wasn't that you'd find another reason to razz my butt!  And we both know it!)  ANYWAY!  I also thought the Bob Dylan scene was funny.  And who knew Pam was so freaking hot?
As for a comedy it was pretty good - I mean, it wasn't SuperBad, but it was better than most of the stuff that's out there!  And seeing that I normally tend to swing towards comedies like A Fish Called Wanda that are a bit drier in humor, that is a lot coming from this overly jaded 30-something woman... Plus, the cast was awesome!  I'm pretty sure everyone from 30 Rock, SNL and the Office appeared at one point of another.

"But I can't make you a house made of candy!  It would melt!"

And Paul Rudd... oh, who am I kidding.  I love you Paul Rudd.  Please come here and make out with me already!  Yummy, delicious, articulate, intelligent Paul Rudd... 

Well, I'm off!
But before I go, what did we learn today?
-That carrots and ritz crackers are really NOT enough to eat before you decided to go boozin'
-That if you meet someone, you should tell the people you're with that you're leaving because if you don't... bruises
-That Pizza and Dr. Pepper really are the cure for most hangovers
-And that Paul Rudd is hot and funny - which makes him hotter (just like Jenna Fischer)
-And you should never tell your friends, when you're drunk, that you think ill of one of the *cough* greatest *cough* bands around aren't that great in your eyes...  
But once again - 1964 - 
The Rolling Stone - "Time is on My Side"
The Who "Can't Explain"
The Bealtes... "I wanna hold your hand" 

Look!  Another night of expelling demons!  

I'm going to go think about Mr Rudd for a while
Funny, smart and sexy

I just want to put him in my pocket and carry him around with me... 


Oh.  Sorry.  GOOD NIGHT!


  1. You take Paul...I'll take Jenna, and we'll see who the last person standing is!!!