Thursday, March 12, 2009

2 funny stories and another reason I'm bitter...



So my son is 5 months old today, and I love it. I really, really do.


People like to tell me, "Just wait! It gets harder!"


Everything in life is hard, but being his mom is wonderful - even with the crappy parts.


Two nights ago the little monster fell asleep an hour before he was supposed to be fed and put to bed, so I woke his little butt up. Well, he needed to be changed so really it was the cold air of the house that woke him up.

Needless to say, he was not happy with me.

So as he lay there, half naked to the world and crying as to say, "Why mom? Why!!!" he begins to pee and ended up peeing on his ear, in his eye and up his nose all before I managed to grab something to cover him and stop the peeing.

Now he's screaming his brains out and to make it worse, I didn't just cover him, I adjusted him so he was aimed at me - and he finished peeing all over my stomach and pants...

oh my poor little son...

So the next day - he's in much better spirits. We are playing games, his favorites are where I make him fly around the house. After about an hour of this I'm tired so I decided to lay down on the kitchen floor. (its a nice cool surface) and I have him laying on my chest and I'm humming the theme to Indiana Jones and he's giggling with his arms out to the side. I keep shifting from side to side singing and it suddenly occurs to me - "If he spits up right now - hahaha - he's gonna puke all over my neck and face."

And as if the thoughts in my brain shot over to him - he did.
So I laid there laughing as he laid above me with spit up dangling from him mouth...

Yes, both things are gross - but both still make me laugh. And right now I need laughter.

Why?

Because I was just served papers about a house I haven't lived in since 2001. And WHY???

BECAUSE MY EX-HUSBAND IS A FIRST CLASS JERK WHO REALLY WANTS TO SEE IF A 5'4" 110lb WOMAN IS WILLING TO PICK HIM UP AND SNAP HIS ASS IN TWO!

And you know what?

I am willing...

Oh how I am...

More baby Einstein please... it's time to fly the kid to the moon...

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