Thursday, October 29, 2009

Are you there god? It's me, a young, yet kinda middle aged woman just putting it out there... you know... Margaret!

So I went to check my PO Box today - still no love notes from a secret admirer... you'd think that since I pretty much begged for one that someone would take the initiative... but alas.. just junk mail.

And then I went to yoga where I got all emotional and did the right thing and tucked it all nice inside.
But it's not that bad because it actually brought me some insight - and isn't that all we really want in our life?

After my little rant about how much I hate the meat industry and walmart I found myself getting all worried that I may hurt someone's feelings, which isn't my intent, but how is that a way to live?
I say that I don't care what people think and then I go and get worried about me being honest...

The only thing I have is my honesty.

So here is it... there are 1,000 things out there that I do not like, but most times I have very valid reasons. I don't want to be the person who says, "'cause!" after someone asks me why I don't or do like something.

I don't like meat/animal products because one day I saw the face of my beloved animal (Lucky) in my minds eye when I was eating dinner. BUT if I was in a Donner situation - I'd do what I needed to do to survive.

I don't understand why it's "O.K." to eat cattle, but not your neighbor down the street - meat is meat, right?

I don't like the fact that I can't help people more - and I mean all people, not just people that I love.

I don't understand why people won't help out more, but I completely understand at the same time. There is only so many times you can get your heart broken into 1,000 pieces before you say "NO MORE!"

I massively dislike wishy washy people who won't make decision, and yes, part of this is because I hate making decisions for other people. I look at my life like this, "Its my life I make MY decision, why can't you do the same?"

I don't understand why people can't say the words "I love you" daily

I hate slow drivers

Big things (that are really little) that drive me bonkers - tapping/fidgeting, whistling, and when people say they "Tivo'd" something when they don't own a Tivo - it's a noun, not a verb.

And I hate when I complain about things because complaining doesn't solve anything...

Hmm... maybe this is why I only have junk mail in my PO Box... I'm non-too-pleasant... :(
haha! I'm just kidding, but joking aside... why do we do that? Why do we pretend all the time.

My advice to you (and to myself) if you don't like your life, take a moment to alter your perception and then change it. Don't be me. Don't be the person that tries so hard to fit in that you forget it's not about that...

I need to go read and then meditate and have a slight freak out session about class tomorrow and then sleep, so you have a good night and I'll talk to you soon...


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