Thursday, November 19, 2009

Just another day...

I've been studying my butt off all week, attempting to memorize things that I probably don't need to, singing things that I do need to.

We, my class, has to sing two different mantras in front of our very one class this weekend. You may think this isn't an issue for me seeing I've sang on stage before, but lets be honest... I'm sure my teacher will find it a bit tacky when I do a shot of jack before I sit on a meditation pillow and chant words in sanskrit that translate to:
I offer myself to the Light, the Auspicious Lord. Who is the True Teacher within and without. Who assumes the forms of reality (truth) and Bliss.
Who is never absent and is full of peace. Independent in His existence.
He is the vital essence of illumination.
See, hard drinking only works with singing when you're in the right forum. Plus, I don't drink jack - and I gave up beer the other day.

Yup - another thing to add to the "vices removed" list:
- cigarettes
- beer
- porn
- cabana boys

my world sucks


In the end it's made me a better person. I'm calmer, which is reflected in the world around me - the world I CREATED around me, so I only complain in jest because honestly - those were all good things to give up.

Granted my husband is attempting to revive the porn habit.

Great support system I have - HA!

Moving on... the holidays are here. Its crazy to me. I feel as thought they snuck up me. I've been so engrossed in my studies, having a nervous breakdown due to my lack of a job, selling things on ebay, and writing a bunch of drivel on here - I think a Gay Pride parade could have snuck up on me... but you know what? I'd probably have more fun at the parade...


And things are good again.

The lack of job thing... I'm trying to just look at it from a different perspective. Didn't I always say if I had a lot of time on my hands I'd write that "book" I started 15 times?

I want to tell you something - all of you. In advance I'm picked on for what I'm about to say - but I don't care. The more I work on this little project, the more I work on me... all these crazy good things have started happening. People being wonderful, STRANGERS being nice, and even when it's scary and bad (due to money) it's not.

Next week - even if they annoy the effin hell out of you - remember that you love your family for a reason. Your whole family, not only the family that's obligated to give you a kidney.

I have to go chant now.

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